ME! My life seems to be never ending drama.
Bryan talked to Joe last night about Leah. Apparently, Leah felt uncomfortable about spanking her daughter because she didn't know how we would react. Per Bry she was afraid we would think less of her for it. (We would'nt have.) Apparently, her daugher does indeed get spanked. However, I still think she could've removed Bro from the room until she calmed down. (And paddled her ass while she was at it.)
She is also trying to get her on a schedule. I sincerely wish her best of luck with that. Her DD needs to be on a schedule.
She didn't give her any of the rice and rolls because DD is a messy eater and she didn't want to mess up our house. So that was done out of respect. Okay, that's fine. At least she was thinking about everyone.
I still think a parenting class wouldn't kill her. I know she's a single Mom. But seriously. I'm a first timer, too. But I at least get advice from books, other parents, doctors on how to give my child the best possibly upbringing. If she thinks that I'm way off by saying her kid needs discipline and a schedule, fine. Tell ya what: Why don't you talk to a child counselor or your pediatrician? I'm sure they'd agree.
Bry also explained that I wasn't mad that Joe had her over, because I wasn't. It was that they left very late, we had to work the next morning, and it also upset Pooks schedule, which isn't pretty. (She woke up at 12:30 screaming. I think she was gassy but she also had her routine interuppted and I think that had a hand in it.) Anyhoo, Joe said he'd talk to her.
Good, it means the problem is solved. I was going to talk to him about it, but since Bry already did no sense in beating a dead horse.
Now for the 3 of you (litterally. THREE) who read my blogs daily, you've got expectations. You expect that I will be my usual snarky sarcastic self. You expect that I don't hold back. Why should I? This is my blog, why should I have to censor myself? You also expect that I will give the information as I know it to be at that time. If it changes later, I'll fill you in.
Blogging is cathartic for me. It lets me vent, which I need. I let a lot of stuff go in my life because I vent about it on here and I feel better. I've made bloggy friends on here, who read my blogs. Its like venting to a friend about my life. Bottom line: I'm not going to stop. If you don't like my site, you can find another site.
I told you that to tell you this: Leah found my blog. She is mad. As in called Joe at 0600 hours crying mad. Of course, Joe was mad. Leah said I insulted her and her child.
To a point, she's right. I did insult her. I was apalled at her DD behavior that night, and what she did/didn't do to stop it. I completely disagree with how she handled the situations, and I wrote as such. Now, I've found out more and blogged as such. So, I'm sorry that I insulted her. (Well...Kinda.)
I'm not sorry about writing about how I viewed the situation. This is my site, and I can do that. If you don't like it, then leave. I vented, which is what I designed this for. If you can't vent on your site, in your home, or with your friends, may I ask who the hell you're supposed to vent to? I will not apologize for blogging about what I knew as facts at the time, nor am I about to apologize for expressing my feelings. Again, if you don't like it, there's the X button: leave. And hey, if you want to start a website called "I Hate Heidi" go for it. It's your American right to do so.
Joe is also pissed that I didn't talk to him about it, and I "chose to go behind her back". Well, yes, Joe, I did. Why? Because Bry had already spoken with him about it, and I wasn't going to beat a dead horse into the ground. I would've blogged last night but I couldn't connect with the laptop. Besides, I have a sneaking suspicion that you bad mouth the hell out of me behind my back all the time anyway. And you know what, I am starting to think we should just keep it this way. You vent to whoever you vent to and I do the same. That way very little tension gets brought into the house. It's not perfect but whatever.
Here's another thing. Joe once mentioned how mature Leah was and (of course) how immature I am. Really, Joe? How does saying she'll kick my ass constitute maturity? Let's think for a moment: if you threaten to kick my ass, do you think that I'm going to hold a higher or lower opinion of you? Do you think I'll think to myself "Wow, what a mature response. I sure am glad this person chose to handle this like an adult. This person just went up a few notches in my book!" No. What I think is, "Try it and see how fast you have an assault charge on your record. Honestly, take it for what it is and grow up. Let it go. If my opinion of you wasn't much before and you're trying to change it, you aren't doing a great job."
In Summary:
This is my site. You don't like it, shove it up your ass. I do like it and I refuse to change it. This is the one place where I can be truly myself. Secondly, it wouldn't hurt to take a few (free) parenting courses for your kid. And honestly, folks, threatening bodily harm isn't a mature way to deal with things. If I really wanted to push the issue, I could have already filed charges. I'm not going to because it's stupid. But next time you think about threatening someone, just ask if there are legal ramifications to your actions. (There normally is.)
HAPPY THANKSGIVING! EAT TOO MUCH, AND HAVE FUN!
WARNING: If you do not believe in corporal punishment or teaching your kids (and yourself for that matter) some good manners, then this post is not for you. Move along folks, nothing to see here.
When we came home last night, the plan was to finish up the laundry and finish cleaning up the den. After that, we planned to re-watch Factory Girl on the boob tube. But, alas, those plans were foiled by Joe, his girlfriend Leah, and her little brat, I mean daughter, Christina.
We had told Joe on Sunday our plans to have everything done, including laundry. We came home and Leah had her entire closets worth of laundry, I swear. And she was using our washer and dryer. Now I understand that doing laundry can get expensive. I’ve been there. But could she have at least waited until Wednesday night, when we’re not there? Or when we’re all done with our laundry? So that was problem number one.
Problem number two was the whole dinner issue. Joe had invited her over for dinner, which was fine; he can have guests over. But again, we’d already told him we had other plans for the house. So now I have to play hostess to this twit, and I wasn’t in the mood, frankly. Also, when you go over to someone’s house for dinner it’s considered good manners to help cook and clean up, even if the hosts refuse your offers. Leah never got that memo.
Problem number three…Was the utter lack of discipline with her 2 year old daughter, Christina. Here’s an example: Leah and Christina were outside. Christina had Leah’s keys. Christina was smacking the keys against our car. I asked her if she could please make her daughter stop. Nothing was done. I wanted to say, “Look, Leah. I don’t want to have to bill a single Mom for body work on my car because you can’t corral your kid, but so help me God if she dents that car…” After a bit, Christina was told it was time to go inside. She threw The. Mother. Of. All. Tantrums. This continued for seven minutes and forty-eight seconds.
Yes, I timed it.
Do you think anything was done? No. She just let her daughter scream, shriek, and pound her fists and feet on the kitchen floor. My six month old daughter is looking at her like, “What the hell is your problem?” Finally, her daughter stopped. I looked at Bryan, horrified. I have this pit in my stomach, thinking this is what I signed up for when that pregnancy test turned blue, thus confirming I was with child.
Now before you say, “Well, you just don’t know toddlers!” and spurn my blog with hatred, let me explain. I know that toddlers can and will throw tantrums, okay? I get that. However, if my Mother or Father, or Bryans Mother or Father, or hell, even Bryan himself had been in that situation, rest assured things would’ve turned out a bit differently. The child would have gotten a few firm swats on the ass, and the kid would’ve been told “If you don’t knock it off, I will give you something to cry about” in That voice.
If you don’t know what That voice is, let me explain. That voice is the voice that imparts the message that if you don’t stop what you’re doing right now, you will rue the day you were born. As a child growing up, you are intimately familiar with that voice. You know that whichever parent is using that voice means business. You know disobeying when That voice is being used will result is your untimely death.
Did is stop there? Of course not, because that would’ve required effort on Leah’s part. No, this kid ran around screaming. Trying to tear up and destroy Pook’s toys. (Mommy forgot to bring any for her.) Trying to hit the baby. Pulling the dogs tail. Taking food right off our plates. (Which, by the way, why couldn’t she have made a plate for her daughter? I understand maybe she wouldn’t have liked the steak, but surely she could’ve had some of the rice and a roll?) The harshest warning or punishment this little demon child got was “Christina May, you stop that.” In the least authoritative voice I’ve ever heard. Had that been me, I would’ve been mortified at my childs behaviors, but it didn’t apparently phase her.
Here’s problem number four. Guests, like fish, stink after awhile and need to be thrown out. How do you know it’s time to leave? If the clock says it’s after 2100 hours and it’s a weekday, then you should leave. If yours hosts are changed into pajamas, you should leave. If your hosts are putting their child to bed, it’s time to leave. If your hosts are falling asleep on the couch, it’s time to leave. If you are falling asleep on the hosts couch, it’s time to leave. Yet another memo that someone forgot to forward onto Leah. How do I know this? Because all 5 examples happened and she still stayed. Someone, please, get in touch with her and give her this memo!
They ended up leaving at one. In. The. Morning. With Christina still tearing through the house. After talking with Bryan, this is normal. Leah doesn’t have her two year old daughter on any kind of a schedule. It is not uncommon for her daughter to go to bed in the wee hours of the morning, sleep all day, whatever. She does what she likes. It is obvious to me that this kid has no discipline, no structure, and no schedule. This kid is going to turn into a candidate for Nanny 911 quickly if Leah doesn’t get off her butt and do something. Hell, she’s already there.
Like I said, I know kids will have tantrums and sometimes you can’t punish them right there. But you generally do something to stop it. A look. A few words. Anything. You do not let your kid run amuck in a guests house, or throw a huge tantrum. If nothing else, take the kid aside and try to calm them down as best you can. Don’t just ignore everything. And Miss Manners would simply die if she found out you not only didn’t ask if it was OK that you tie up their laundry room for the whole night, you didn’t offer to help with dinner or dishes, and you wayyy overstayed your welcome. To say nothing if your child appalling behavior.
In closing, let me just say this. Had that been me, I wouldn’t have been able to sit for a week. My parents would’ve profusely apologized to the hosts, paddled my butt, and promptly died of shame.
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