Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. It’s been awhile. Good things come to those who wait. So, uh, yeah. Take that, Internet.
USMC: Hey thanks for deploying Gaki. It’s not like I don’t love him or anything, noooo. It’s not like I wanted to see him again. It’s not like he doesn’t have a nephew who adores him, who thinks the sun rises and sets with him. Nope, not at all. Not like he didn’t have other friends who love him and want him, y’know, ALIVE. Thank you, USMC.
Jackie: I love you, Triplet Doppelganger. Our conversations over the last couple of days have been interesting, no? Oh, sweet cheeks, you’re such a dear. Love you, m’dear. Give your darling and your kid a kiss from me. Kisses, bitch. Thank you, Jackie.
Delana: You might ask why I’m thanking you. Well for one, you finally let a good man go so he can finally move on with his life. Secondly, you’ve been a BIG source of entertainment for me. It’s quite nice because next to you I look like a sanest woman to ever walk the Earth, and God knows that’s the furthest thing from the truth. Well, you wouldn’t know about telling the truth so I guess you can’t relate. Anywho, Thank You, Delana!
Corporate: Thanks for the $500 bonus check. I really needed that. Oh, and thanks to my Regional VP’s for personally calling to thank me. There’s nothing quite like getting a compliment for all your hard work. For realz, yo. (Yes, I did pass High School English. Hush.) Thank You, Corporate!
Silver Safari: I love, love, love my piercing! It was affordable, it didn’t hurt, and he was so professional. I love it, thank you! I feel cool again. (Scary thought, isn’t it?) Thank You, Silver Safari.
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