Pneumonia: Thanks for nothing, you douchbag virus. Thanks for knocking me flat on my damn ass. Because of you I can't hold my daughter for a week and a half. Bastard. Thank you for nothing, Pneumonia.
Codiene: Loooove you. Love the cough medicince you're in. Love whatever drug company made you. Love that fact that because of you I can kinda sorta breathe again. To quote Saving Abel, "I'm so addicted to all the things you" Thank you, Codiene!
Daytime TV: Thank you. Because of you I'm reminded as to why I like to go to work. There's only so many reruns of Nash Bridges, infomercials, and crappy talk shows one can watch before I throw up. And I'm resigned to watch you for the next week. Damn I want to go back to work. Thank you, Daytime TV!
Kleenex with lotion: Thank GOD you're here. I was looking at having a red, cracked, chapped nose and a stiff upper lip without you. Considering that I'm blowing my nose every other effing minute, you never really appreciate how much soft tissues matter. Because of you my nose isn't as decimated as my lungs. Thank you, Kleenex with Lotion!
Epilepsy: Thank you. Without you I would have no reason to singlehandedly support the Anbesol Company and other companies of its ilk. I'm supporting the economy! Thank you, Epilepsy!
Bryan: Thank you for our daughter, Pook. Thank you for teaching me that I'm the only one who will stand up for me, and that I need to. Thank you for teaching me that my needs are important, and deserve to be met. Thank you for three years. Three rollercoaster years. Thank you, Bryan.
Old Wolf & Cindy: Thank you both for helping me through a very trying time. You've listened to me cry, laugh, rage, and rationalize. Without you two I could not have made it through this. I love you both dearly. Thank you, Old Wolf & Cindy!
Anbesol & Kanka: Without you two I could not talk right now. Not that I can really speak with your help, you know..The whole swollen tongue thing. But at least I don't howl in pain every time I move my damn tongue. Thank you, Anbesol & Kanka!
John: Even if this doesn't work out in five minutes, five days, five weeks, or five years. You've taught me that I am indeed beautiful and dammit I deserve to be told that. Thank you, John!
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